I wish you had asked a couple days ago so we could get pics together, etc.
I was going to try to describe chocks, tie downs, tie down access points, Canyon Dancer, suspension compression, don't do it with the kickstand down and other good points and realised it is hopeless in the time we have.
So, the best way to get this bike home is this...
Take a friend with you to drive your car back. Pick up the bike, and RIDE it home! Believe me, this is the best way.
A Canyon dancer works great most of the time, especially on a stock bike with glued on grips. It slides over the handlebars and cinches down to hold it on nicely. I have seen problems on bikes where the grips dont get glued on and it moves them a bit.
Use only Ancra Tie Downs.... Right Bubba?
Leave enough suspension travel in the forks to soak up the bumps, you want it compressed enough to hold the bike in place, but you dont want to crank all the way down.
Use tie downs on the rear to stabilize it. Usually you can run soft ties through the passenget pegs and tie down the rear. All you want to do here is keep the rear end from skipping around when you hit a bump.
Keep the bike straight up. You will see some tools tying a bike down on the sidestand, but usually they are the ones that use bailing twine to do it.
yeah - only ancras. i have a problem with my bike in the trailer, the end always seems to hump around. so if you are going to use a trailer and are going over some bumby roads - make sure you at least anchor the back down